Showing posts with label loss. Show all posts
Showing posts with label loss. Show all posts

Monday, December 9, 2013

From the Archives. When you have to let go... and let grace take hold this season.



"In every situation God is doing a thousand things that we cannot see and do not know."
-John Piper

Lately life’s blows have left me speechless.

If you know me then this is a feat in and of itself. (Wink, wink.)

At times it's been over-whelming and yet we have been quietly trudging forward. The verse that says,
“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”
 has never been more poignant. (Matthew 6:34)

And while I could go on and on about our own families “stresses” my heart is more heavy laden for those dear hearts of my friends and family around me.

One dear young friend who is grieving the loss of not only her mother, but the grandmother who raised her. Both passed only a week apart.


A mother who is grieving the gut-wrenching loss of her baby.






A brave heart who is fighting the attacks of the enemy as she heals from the damage left by childhood abuse.

A few of my friends who are about to celebrate their Christmas season for the first time without their loved ones. 


A friend who was told his place of work would be closing at the end of the month when he has 4 little mouths to feed.




One who is about to undergo another barrage of medical tests as the Doctors search for a diagnosis yet again.

Another in debilitating pain, still trying to work and support the family.

And more than one of my friends are dealing with the pain of affairs and divorce.

Yet still, there’s more my friends, so much more.





I am sure you have been there because life is not always rosy, and every rose has its thorns as well.

 I am reminded of something the Lord revealed to me on a cloudy, rainy day as I sat in the airplane awaiting the take-off. The rain dripped down the windows of the plane and carried the heavy cares of the day downward to the ground.

The heavy clouds hung low, dark and gloomy, but as the plane made its decisive turn  on the runway and began its ascent. As it continually pointed its nose upward towards the heavens something amazing happened.

Onward and upward we plunged into the dark clouds. They grew so thick around the plane that I found myself unable to see through the masses of gray apparitions. 

Suddenly a flash of blinding light broke forth searing my eyes. I blinked several times and had to look away, but yet there it was…The blue sky, the sun, they were still there even during the storm.

The deep azure expanse of bright glowing sky was all the more alluring after the hopeless pallor of the storm clouds. The rain drops that were being pushed back across the window pane from the ascending winds, sparkled in the suns bright and blinding light. A light that caused the once gray clouds from below to almost glow, stretching into fluffy white rolling plains here above the storms.

And then I heard the Lord whisper to my heart,

 “You see my daughter? I am still shining even during the storms of life. I am still working good things for my children. I am always here.”

And so my friends, in our dark nights when our questions and "whys," pour out in a torrent into our tear stained pillows, this I cling to...

This I absolutely know.

Our God never grows tired or weary and He never ever stops working for our good.

Isaiah  40:28-31

Do you not know?
    Have you not heard?
The Lord is the everlasting God,
    the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
    and his understanding no one can fathom.
He gives strength to the weary
    and increases the power of the weak.
Even youths grow tired and weary,
    and young men stumble and fall;
but those who hope in the Lord
    will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
    they will run and not grow weary,
    they will walk and not be faint.

Romans 8:28
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.


So like a sweet friend encouraged me the other day, I will let “grace take hold” for I have nothing left to offer and in the end I know the result will be His masterful craftsmanship.  A life's work that will point gloriously to the Lord because it is showered in His beautiful finger prints.






Thursday, June 6, 2013

When you have to let go... and "Let grace take hold."



"In every situation God is doing a thousand things that we cannot see and do not know."
-John Piper

Lately life’s blows have left me speechless.

If you know me then this is a feat in and of itself.

At times it's been over-whelming and yet we have been quietly trudging forward. The verse that says,
“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”
 has never been more poignant. (Matthew 6:34)

And while I could go on and on about our own families “stresses” my heart is more heavy laden for those dear hearts of my friends and family around me.

One who found her daughter has wandered into the dark and dangerous territory of a cult.


A mother who is grieving the gut-wrenching loss of her baby.





A brave heart who is fighting the attacks of the enemy as she heals from the damage left by childhood abuse.

Another that is planning her sweet Daddy's funeral after he was taken too soon.


A friend who was told his place of work would be closing at the end of the month when he has 4 little mouths to feed.



One who is about to undergo another barrage of medical tests as the Doctors search for a diagnosis yet again.

Another in debilitating pain, still trying to work and support the family.


And more than one of my friends are dealing with the pain of affairs and divorce.

Yet still, there’s more my friends, so much more.

I am sure you have been there because life is not always rosy, and every rose has its thorns as well.

As we sit here with a silly flooded basement and a hubby who has been ill, sick kids and some of our own life’s plans thrown up in the air, it really all seems minor in perspective.

 I am reminded of something the Lord revealed to me on a cloudy, rainy day as I sat in the airplane awaiting the take-off. The rain dripped down the windows of the plane and carried the heavy cares of the day downward to the ground.

The heavy clouds hung low, dark and gloomy, but as the plane made its decisive turn  on the runway and began its ascent. As it continually pointed its nose upward towards the heavens something amazing happened.

Onward and upward we plunged into the dark clouds. They grew so thick around the plane that I found myself unable to see through the masses of gray apparitions. 

Suddenly a flash of blinding light broke forth searing my eyes. I blinked several times and had to look away, but yet there it was…The blue sky, the sun, they were still there even during the storm.

The deep azure expanse of bright glowing sky was all the more alluring after the hopeless pallor of the storm clouds. The rain drops that were being pushed back across the window pane from the ascending winds, sparkled in the suns bright and blinding light. A light that caused the once gray clouds from below to almost glow, stretching into fluffy white rolling plains here above the storms.

And then I heard the Lord whisper to my heart,

 “You see my daughter? I am still shining even during the storms of life. I am still working good things for my children. I am always here.”

And so my friends, in our dark nights when our questions and "whys," pour out in a torrent into our tear stained pillows, this I cling to...

This I absolutely know.

Our God never grows tired or weary and He never ever stops working for our good.

Isaiah  40:28-31

Do you not know?
    Have you not heard?
The Lord is the everlasting God,
    the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
    and his understanding no one can fathom.
He gives strength to the weary
    and increases the power of the weak.
Even youths grow tired and weary,
    and young men stumble and fall;
but those who hope in the Lord
    will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
    they will run and not grow weary,
    they will walk and not be faint.

Romans 8:28
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.


So like a sweet friend encouraged us the other day, I will let “grace take hold” for I have nothing left to offer and in the end I know the result will be His masterful craftsmanship.  A life's work that will point gloriously to the Lord because it is showered in His beautiful finger prints.

Thursday, March 7, 2013

Bracing for Impact with the Living God.



Recently my hubby and I had the privilege of returning to the Simply Youth Ministry Conference. Our intentions were to gain training for a couple of college students who are called to ministry.

I was not expecting much for myself. You see my hubby and I have found ourselves in a year of dis-orientation...

Meaning, good friends have passed away or lost their jobs, family strife, our church is without a Pastor and wrestling with it, and so much more...

To put it plainly we have felt disoriented.

I thank God for the Simply Youth Ministry team for listening to the promptings of the Holy Spirit. Disorientation was a theme discussed again and again at the conference. 

God, You are always right on top of things aren't You?

 I have a few posts for you on lessons I learned while there. I hope they bless you. The posts are very raw, but maybe...just maybe there are some out there who can relate? 

I pray this finds you, the souls who are trying to stand in the midst of storms and cry out to the living God for the strength to follow His will. I am grateful for this truth, that in the process we absolutely will discover His unfathomable grace and amazing love. 

God Bless you all greatly,

-Heather


Jesus, You just keep messing with me.

Turning my insides out...
Shaking the loose pieces to the ground...Sifting.
You are a fire scathing, seething, licking away the impurities and reducing me to liquid.

It's been painful...I feel like I bleed and cry and scream, but to no one but Jesus, because who else would understand this anyways?

Then comes the reminder...
He is the God of the light and the dark.

"Seriously, Lord?!? What do you want from me?"
 I ask searching for answers yet again.

Hot messy tears begin pouring out as I sit huddled and bent over tucking my head into my knees.
I am rocking with my hands over my head as if I am bracing for impact in a plane crash.

White knuckling it, I try to restrain the sobs as I feel my face growing red from the tension. Fearing it might burst forth in all its ugliness and confusion, I find I am holding my breath...

I am bracing for impact with a 
Living and Holy God.

Shaking....
Hoping no one notices me in this state of fear and heart ache under the cloud of darkness in the worship session I whisper,

“ I don't like this Lord.” Sobs begin to escape my throat , “This scares me... Why? Why now?”

Then...

His words rush over me like a crashing wave.

“Oh how I love you daughter.
I do... I love you.”

As if I am in the choppy tangled waves of the ocean

I gasp for breath in great gulps. I feel like I am drowning.

In the darkness of the worship session I hide.

“I don't like this Father. This scares me. Please no...Please no, no, not this!”

I beg and beg as I rock. He whispers gently again,

“I love you. Trust me. Obey.”

Again and again this was the message. It scares me, this task He is asking from us. Its different. (I am not always great with change.)

Now we are diving into the unknown and uncharted waters and this definitely requires trust.

“Not my will, but yours be done Lord.”

I will wrestle my will and fears to the mat...Through Your love and grace, Lord, I will surrender to You and Your ways.

Oh Jesus, You are unrelenting and I find myself grateful for You never ever give-up. Father, Your ways are not my own and Your thoughts are not mine.

Once again, with knees still knocking, I stand.
I am shaky still, but my feet are planted on Your solid rock of Truth.

I raise my hands high. Lifting my face to the light, I offer my heart again to You in worship and praise. I open my mouth and sing.

Will you join me friends? In the tough times? In heart ache and loss? In the pain and confusion will you join me and sing?





Do you have something you are wrestling with?

An area of your life where things are confusing or painful?

Can I pray for you friends?