Wednesday, May 30, 2012
Questions on Friendship...
I have a question? What makes a good friend?
Is it that they make you laugh or that you have a lot in common? Is it that they seem to genuinely care about you? Are they a good listener? Do they show up in your time of need? Do they love you even when you make mistakes or make a fool of yourself?
Let’s switch gears. What makes a bad friend?
I have experienced some people that were bad friends. Have you had one of these, or maybe too many of these? You know you call them to talk, maybe share something that’s bugging you, and they barely listen to you. If they are really stellar, they might even interrupt you to tell you something about themselves instead. Or maybe they go into the trumping battle. Like oh that’s awful, but this, this, and this happened to me and its way worse! They can get even worse and then share your details with others and completely add new details creating a monster of a lie about what you really said. Maybe they even stab you in the back or blame you for their downfalls in life.
Maybe they only really call you because they need something? Have you had one of these? I am not talking about a good friend that’s in the midst of a tough time. I am talking about the ones who are never available to help you, but they always need something from you. How long do you put up with this? This person who barely listens to anything you say. Who cuts you off to start talking about themselves again and again? Who only calls when they need you to help them out of their next fiasco? How long?
It’s easy to get sick of these people, to start avoiding their calls and texts. It’s easy to convince ourselves that it’s for the best to “de-friend” them on facebook. Maybe you tried to do the right thing and honestly share politely that this friendship feels very one-sided, or maybe you end up screaming it out after you hit your boiling point and the friendship goes down in a blaze of glory. (I sure hope not.)
Can I share something with you?
It’s so very heart wrenching to me. It breaks my heart. I don’t want to share this. I am utterly ashamed because….
I have had moments and periods of my life where I have been absolutely guilty of being like this to someone who has been nothing, but amazingly good to me.To be continued...