WARNING-------What you are about to read is a bit messy and
rife with errors. Like my life right now.
Hi Friends,
I am sorry it has been so long. I have missed you all. This
last month has been full of ups and downs. I stopped writing when I came down
with a “lovely” bronchial infection for about 2-3 weeks, but honestly did not
return to writing because God is teaching me so many things. (Man, that sounds
really lame, but I assure you it’s the truth.)
I know I will
eventually be able to put all these lessons He has been teaching me into words
without sounding like a crazy mess of a bleeding heart. Okay, I cannot even
promise that. I am a mess right now.
Lately I cry when reading scripture. (Why can’t I just read
it and think on it like a normal good little Christian? Nope, right now I cry.
His words break my heart. My lack of action breaks my heart.) I love my Lord so
very much, and He is really re-working me in some areas.
Then while reading
this book “Seven” by Jen Hatmaker, God began to escalate some of these things
that I had finally shoved behind the couch in my mind because I could not
figure out what to do with them. (Thank you Jen!)
For example, after returning from Africa I found myself
walking through my home thinking, why in the world do I have so much stuff? Why
do I place so much importance on what others think of how well decorated or
updated my home is when people are literally starving to death?
When I found
myself alone in our home, I would literally look around the room and
examine all the pieces of furniture and think, “I don’t need that. Am I willing
to give it all up?” (This from a person that attaches sentimental meanings to objects like crazy.)
I have done
fundraisers and worked with our teens and we have raised thousands of dollars
to help the poor here in the US and across the globe, but how often am I being truly
intentional with my “stuff” that I have accumulated. Yes, I can mindlessly
donate it to “Good Will”, or to the “Salvation Army”, (Both great places to
donate) but what if I am more intentional and seek out someone who really needs
it? What if I give away things I really love, but do not need?
What if I stop eating so much food simply because I am on an
emotional whim or because my goodness I just love food? (And I do, I love
cooking, baking, all the wonders of the culinary world.)
What if I start eating
not to satisfy my taste buds and emotional outbursts, (Ode to chocolate how I
love you!) but as I should to feed this “temple” the Lord has given me. I truly
am excited with the over-haul God has given me on my view of food this last
month. Why am I so excited? Stay tuned
my friends, stay tuned…
I am thrilled to say I started my "Seven" fast
with a friend of mine from church. (Thank you Jesus for giving me such a
wonderful soul to go through this fast with!) I started with month one which covers food and
I cannot wait to write about what He has been teaching me through it.
(Obviously)
Here is where I have to tell you that I just love how the
Lord works. He is such a beautiful master-mind.
While reading the book, “Seven” and starting my, “Seven”
fast I simultaneously was reading the biography of Dietrich Bonhoeffer. Also midway
through reading the book, "Seven", I began another book called “The Irresistible Revolution” by Shane Claiborne that one of my teens, I call her my “dear daughter”
handed to me and told me I needed to read.
I was completely in
the dark at the time, that these books all intermingle on the same topics over
and over again. I was even more clueless to the fact that they might even
literally mention each other by name. Oh Lord, you are such a clever one. Mmm,
mmm, mmm…
Oh Lord, Your ways are not mine and that has never been as
abundantly clear as it is right now.
I hope you stay tuned my friends, there is more to come on
my mess. ;)
Micah 6:8
Seek Justice, Love Mercy, and Walk Humbly with your God.
