Am I All "in" or a Passive Princess?

So many thoughts have been swirling through my mind like dust and sand swirls up with the hot and blistering winds across the desert.  Shifting, twirling, and picking up new thoughts, emotions, and ideas as it travels forth. 

Like an impending cloud of doom, I have been at a cross roads that could lead me into a downward spiral of depression. In other words, this week has been rough.

We have been bombarded with bad news from many different angles, whether it’s at church, with friends, from family, or even in our own home. 

So this week I have tried to be even more intentional with reading God’s word. These rough times are where I normally want to get spiritually lazy. To crawl into bed and pull the covers tightly over my head hoping they will muffle the bad news from the world around me.

You know what? This never works. The world keeps turning whether I decide to tune it out or not. 

My friends, my family, my church family, they still need people to comfort them, and speak hope and truth to them. They need someone to be a shoulder to cry in or an invisible prayer warrior in the background of the fight.

This week I have been making myself sit and ponder God’s words. Can you picture a mom constantly reminding her child to get back to their homework? Yes, mentally that is what I have been doing. 

Scolding and prodding myself to be intentional with my quiet times with the Lord. At times, I am even adopting the role of a sports coach yelling at myself to do more sit-ups… Err I mean read His Word. Does this make me crazy? Maybe…

Anyways, I am choosing to be extra intentional with my quiet time study of His Word. Whether it’s through a devotional reading or some straight-up Bible reading I am kicking my lazy rear into gear.

I mean it; l am kicking my spiritual work-out into a fervor. If running hard for 30 minutes does not leave me challenged or slightly sore then I know I need a bigger challenge to endure if I want to gain  results. Especially if I want to build new muscles and burn away the old fat and chub away...

The same method can apply to me spiritually, if I find myself unaffected by the readings then I must press on and dig deeper. I will re-read them, and take time to chew on and ponder them.

  I am choosing to struggle through the distractions and despair that may be plaguing me so that there is finally a clear path for the Lord to work in my heart.

Have you seen Sleeping Beauty? Do you remember that part where Maleficent has entangled the castle that holds the sleeping Aurora in massive black vines and thorns? This really resonates with me. I can just see the prince as he fights his way through the over-growth of thorns and vines to reach His love in the Castle.

I picture the Lord, as my love fighting His way through my apathy, through my tendencies to ponder too much on the negative news and pain I am surrounded with. He fights until He reaches the castle and bestows a kiss. 

His kiss of Love,

          brings an awakening to life, 

                                 light, love, and restoration.

I love this visual. It helps me to identify the enemy and the ways he is trying to ensnare me to feel hopeless, but there is so much more to this.

The Lord calls us to pick up a sword and join Him!

So this week I am choosing to fight alongside of my Lord. I will wield my sword of Truth and Love and hack away through my vines of apathy and frustrations, because God calls me to be “in” all of this tangled mess that is life.

 (I love that He calls me to be in this battle, to not passively sleep like Aurora waiting for a rescue. He calls me to pick up a sword and shield and fight, besides I have always loved a challenge, so why am I standing around and just taking the hits?)

He calls me to be “in” this battle; to be His hands and Feet. I need to be LOVE in the midst of all this hurt and anger. I will choose to be love in the midst of sorrow and strife; to be love in the here and now. I know I am not to wage war as the enemy does, but with love, grace, forgiveness, and truth.

“Because Real love is not afraid to bleed.”

 This is a quote from one of my favorite bands, The Rend Collective. 

The song continues on to say,

 “I’ve counted up the cost 

and 

You’re worth everything.”

It’s so true! Lord you are worth my everything.

This week I am choosing to be “in” this and run the race set before me. (Hebrews 12:1-3) I will continue to make myself get up; to be “present” in the midst of the pain and heart ache, but most of all to be in the presence of my Lord. 

He is the one who gives me the strength, the wisdom, the joy, and the peace to stand. (Isaiah 40:28-31) This week started rough. My time with Him was a struggle, but it is finishing strong.

I pray this for you too, my friends. I pray you choose life and love over death and hate. Instead of bitterness, and condemnation, I pray you choose to bestow grace and forgiveness. Remember Love does, even when it’s hard…Love does.

Ephesians 6:10-18

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes.

 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. 

Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace.

 In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith,with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people.

How are you doing Friends? 

Are you in the midst of pain or battles? 

How can I be in prayer for you?